"Write without pay until someone offers pay. If nobody offers pay within three years, the candidate may look upon this circumstance as the sign . . . that sawing wood is what he was intended for." — Mark Twain


Sawing Wood chronicles the travels and artistic ventures of a young family as they move from San Francisco to Boise to Boulder, CO in pursuit of a place to call home.


Monday, March 14, 2011

National Security: One Hen Coop at a Time

7 March 2011, Boise

Who knows but if men constructed their dwellings with their own hands, and provided food for themselves and families simply and honestly enough, the poetic faculty would be universally developed, as birds universally sing when they are so engaged?” -- Thoreau, Walden, “Economy”

Winter is nearing its end, but like an old man intent on showing the world he still has some kick left in him, the season gave us a four-day storm of snowfall and near-zero lows — all of it more flurry than force. Days before that a warm front had pushed up from the coast, bringing with it Oregon juncos and chickadees riding the soft wave north. I had just returned from three days of back-country skiing in the Sawtooths with my good friend Dave M. from Sonoma County, and it felt like we'd stepped out of central Idaho into balmy Northern California. But now the chilled air is back and the juncos are chittering in the bare trees, perhaps feeling cheated somehow, perhaps looking on the bright side as the sun melts away at the snow patches on the ground. That's February for you: a warm caress from the south, then an icy suckerpunch from the north. But you can't feel too badly for being duped when you see how many migrating song birds have been fooled just the same.

Yesterday we went to dinner at the home of our friends A.W. and J.B. For a year now I'd been hearing about their famous “compound” over in the southeast-end of town, and I was anxious to see it for myself. A is an artist, and her husband J is a craftsman; and with their sweet two-year old daughter, and A's sisters living next door, the whole fam-damnily has put together a big shared property that is about as village-utopian as you could hope for. The sprawling backyard is a combination of neighboring yards with the fences taken down. There are garden plots and cherry trees, solar panels on the rooftops, landscaped fire pits and picnic tables, a ditch canal that runs water from the Boise River (which they have a share of), and a big yurt on a platform that serves as A's studio and houses her glass kiln.

But what takes the cake is the chicken coop. Down the spine of the block runs the canal through an easement between the backyards. At first they had put a coop back there and set a few chickens adrift, and then the neighbors got curious. Soon everybody on both sides of the canal wanted in. And now you push through the wire gate to a menagerie of hens of every kind: dozens of them, skirting underfoot, cawing, amazing in their variety and brilliance, soothing in their murmuring calls. The deep warm straw smell of the coop brought me back to my grandparents' place in Italy: an Old World feeling of home and security and coziness. We collected a few eggs and gave them to Ada to carry in her basket. She was delighted out of her mind by the birds. And as if that wasn't enough, she went silly over the plump lazy rabbit that has taken up home with the birds.

Back in the house, toasty warm with the stove burning, we drank beer and ate dinner and talked while the girls ran about the place. Or rather, J and I ran our mouths. We were glad to have sympathetic ears and so we got things running pretty hot: why are so many American's so damn ignorant? Ignorant of their own working past and traditions of craft and self-sufficiency? In part because this present manifestation of the American Dream is fundamentally a suburban one, conceived in the Fifties and perpetuated by corporate interests, which would rather keep us as children forever wanting trinkets instead of providing for ourselves; forever fatuous and fattened up, cut off from the wisdom of the land and our grandparents, believing that if you use your hands you deserve to scrape along, and that if you want to get somewhere in life, it's got to be upwards into the digital heavens of finance and technology. We talked about Thoreau's economics of self-sufficiency; we talked about the Confucian Code of Fealty: family first, then your block, then your village, then your countryside, and somewhere past the concentric rings of the horizon, your “country”.

All of this at a time when the state of Wisconsin (and other states, including Idaho) are vying to strip public workers of their right to collective bargaining. What will it take for us to remember, to relearn, our working class history and common strength. Common people fighting the excesses and advantages of the wealthy few who both pull the levers of the machine and draw the drapes of media which hide the machine. All of this while the people in Tunisia and Egypt and Libya are rallying to the precipice of revolution. If they have the courage, why don't we? I'm not arguing for revolution in this country, not on a national level. Americans are not quite uncomfortable enough for that to happen yet. So long as TV dinners come twenty to a cheap-pack at Costco, the revolution will never pry itself from its Lazyboy.

Except on a local level. We've all heard the rallying cry. But it's a timeless refrain, going all the way back to Confucius' days, back to the German and British Romantics, the American Transcendentalists, even the Arts and Crafts movement: quality over quantity; craft over consumption; local over diesel-driven shipping containers. Your first devotion, your first revolution, must be to and at home, and from there the effort ripples out to your block, your town, and long long down the line, if ever, to your so-called country.



Friday, March 4, 2011

Life's Economy

7 Feb 2011, Boise

Five am: a grey horizon at the bottom of an otherwise black western sky, light from the sunken sun carrying somehow from under the earth, reflecting off the flanks of the atmosphere to glint off that low distant bottom of the night.

There's never enough time in life. Or rather, there's always too much ambition. How can there not be enough time? It's like saying there's not enough life. And there is all the life around you that you can dive into, if you want it. But still, I suppose, one always craves more. It's the craving that skews our estimate. Craving doesn't quit even after you've topped your twentieth peak, but looks out on the twenty others unclimbed and hanging from the sky.

What I crave is more time, more life, with my family, my wife and daughter. The need to work is a cruel one in this modern age. Outside of going off together to gather berries and set traps, what kind of economics might we invent that allows us to be and work and live together more? We all need our personal time. But that's something different. I do feel a tad guilty over writing when I've been off at the job site for most of the day. I pit my vital personal time against our vital family time. But that's not the right standoff. It's job time that must compromise. If I give up, even a little, the things which sustain me, which inspire and distinguish my spirit, then I give up, by the same amount, what I have of myself to offer my daughter and wife. If I don't write, I don't live; I love life less and thus myself less and thus everyone around me, even my dearest, feels less of the soul that suffers in me.

I don't mean this as a narcissistic excuse for writing all hours of the day, but as an examination of the day's economics.

It's five in the morning, a soft darkness extending from beyond the glow of my little desk lamp, night's shadow like a cape over the rooftops and the valley below, scattered with a few neighborhood lights like morning stars. I came home from work last night and popped a beer and maybe it was the cold raw blue February breeze that had nipped at me all day as I hung siding, but I was in a testy mood and I took a testy nip out of Anna. She had made a comment that morning about my writing late into the morning (while she herself hadn't been able to paint for days, as she was watching Ada), and now I gave her my rebuttal. It was a mean argument, or I felt mean making it. To say, I work all day so I've got the right to an hour or two to write, is to oversimplify my day and to overlook hers. She watches Ada most of the day, has precious little time to herself, and rarely any studio time. At the very least, I get a break to myself when I'm off pounding nails and gazing out at the torn whitecaps of an ocean blue sky. The fundamental need here is for both of us to have a creative corner to ourselves each day. And when it doesn't happen, we both get cranky, depressed, and the world loses a shade of its vividness. To say nothing of romance.

So that is why I'm back on my old pre-dawn schedule. I had dropped off of it because we were training Ada to sleep without her mama, that is, without her breasts. She sleeps with me and it's a dear sweet thing to have that baby girl tenderness curled against you, until of course the kitty's claws come out and she bawls you awake out of your dreams. Meanwhile Anna tries to catch up on nineteen month's of dream deficit. The training had me sleeping pretty badly and hence I'd taken to sleeping in till seven. But by the time breakfast is over, and Ada is dressed, it's nearly mid-morning when I get to typing. So our day gets cramped.

But last night, after our tussle, I resolved to get up at five again, regardless. There is a sharpness, a keenness of mind that comes to you once you're up, had a couple cups of coffee, and the rest of the world around you floats in darkness. But this keenness can't for the life of me can't figure out what to do about the quandry of work. I'm not yet smart or rich enough for that. I know how to work, I've been a good mule that way since I had my first job at fourteen. And right now, other than carpentry, I know only one thing that truly drives me: writing. I also know what puts food on the table, and what doesn't.

There's alway enough time in life, if you get up early enough.